continuation of the Curious About IRLS Carrd!

HOW DO I SET BOUNDARIES W/ MYSELF REGARDING REALITY?

So.. How do you set boundaries with this kind of stuff?


Well, its different for everyone!You have to pay attention / be aware of how each headspace makes you feel / what effect it has on you."Can this IRL make me feel like I dont belong in this world if I talk about memories too much?""Can this IRL lead to unsafe actions if not talked out of gently?""Is this IRL ok as long as negative things arent mentioned?"Are all good questions to ask in regard to it.

Its may take awhile to get a grip on these kinds of things as delusions are very unpredictable / hard to really acknowledge when you've lost touch with reality.Keep people close to you informed so if they choose to they can help you, stay safe.Please understand that coping by being a character or an IRL with delusional memoeries can be something that needs to be addressed in therapy to help you detach, delusions cant just go away, but continuing to be in them at some point can be so so unhealthy, please make sure you listen to people and be aware of what you may need to do!

TERMS

terms that I use / know about!

IRLS - [ME] In Real Life | another term for D/As , explained in the INTRO section!
[not coined by a doctor]Headspaces - other terms for people's IRLS / Delusional attachmentsShift - shifting into other headspaces!Media - the media / source based on the IRL!Mediamate - main term for IRLs to use to refer to people they share a media with!Mediacall - similar to sourcecall, trying to find people from the same media!RC - Reality Check, to check someone's realityID- Identity!Double - Someone with the same IRL as someone else!
[INTROJECTS NEVER COUNT AS DOUBLES. I've seen too many people who think this.]

EXPERIENCES

The creator of this carrd / server owner"At the start of my delusions, it was really hard. I was SUPER against doubles, I had the "I'm the only me" mentality when it came to IRLS. I joined servers with NDLs [ no doubles lists] , among other horrible mentalities that were devastating to my mental health. Over time, I have been learning to cope and separate myself! As much as these identities still affect me, but I know my boundaries to what can cause me to lose touch with reality vs what I can manage, so I have a 'safety net' with close people so they know when I'm too far gone, how it can help me, and when its not just a comfort thing anymore and something that can definitely be unhealthy. This isn't an experience I wish on anyone, this isn't fun or silly. I lose who I am as a person sometimes, sometimes I dont know who I am outside of my IRLs if I'm not careful, but at the same time I can't [harshly] reality check myself till they're gone because of the sheer panic that could cause me personally. Sometimes it even pushes me farther into delusions and I'll convince myself things are wrong etc etc, which is why I say gentle + consensual boundary RCing works better for some people apart from RCing harshly and warping reality even more in some cases."

Server Member;; Toby \ Tubbo"for me i feel as if i am that person, and i get flashbacks to experiences i have in media, which helps me connect to who i am, i get memories that i dont like and ones that i do, my memories do change sometimes depending on which irl i have at the time!! it can be very confusing at times and hard to figure out as well; thats why it's best to ask people who have experiences with IRLs/DAs for help"Server Member;; Kat"Ok well we experience a multitude of psychotic episodes, most of them result in extreme depression, dissociation, and/or grief. They can leave me heart broken if my delusion doesn't line up with reality exactly, and can often lead to break downs. It can alter my entire identity and cause me to lash out at friends if they say something to trigger a delusion. My reality cannot be questioned by anyone other than me so reality checking doesn't do anything but feeding into it will cause a deep spiral. People refering to me as a different name or asking questions about what im doing in relation to my delusion can cause confusion and anger. Often leading to paranoia against my friends. Basically an all around negative experience."Server Member;; [To Be Continued!]

FAQ



If I'm uncomfortable with this.. Would it make me ableist or closed minded or problematic?No! not everyone is going to be comfortable with this, its a personal mental health issue, not everyone needs to feel responsible for that! For more advice theres more in "NOT COMFORTABLE W/ IRLS?"!!
Only thing I could see coming off as problematic is saying
"Y'all are just chronically online"
"this doesnt exist"
"this is stupid"
Dismissing experiences can be hurtful!

As a system I dont want IRLS interacting with us like we're source-based, because we're our own peopleMake it clear to them! Set those boundaries! If its crossed make sure y'all can stay safe and also distance yourself from people like that if you see fit!


I notice that as an IRL this is feeling too real for me, I fear its getting unhealthy..Please try to distance yourself for media-based things, If you chose your current name because of an IRL, find another so you have something to hold onto that is based on you and you only! Try not to refer to your IRLs as you and set reality-based boundaries so your friends do the same and respect your boundaries for your own healing! /sug, This wont work for everyione but hopefully its a foundation!


I still dont understand IRLs...Thats okay! try to ask people around you who have been open to you about this stuff for their experience it may help with understanding!


What if.. I dont want to get better? IRLS feel like,, me? I dont want to let go even if its unsafe for me....I understand, I do, and living with the constant identity issues is hard, its so hard. Please consider talking to a professional as they can definitely help you much more than I can! If you can't, do your best to think about how it could affect you long-term, you've got this, I believe in you, you can heal.

this will be updated in the future!